Day #42

     I've heard the expression a hundred times that says, "Put yourself on the list" Amongst the 5000 things we as mothers have to do in a day.... we are somehow supposed to put ourselves on that list. I would have to be # 5001. But today I realized why that is important and I need to figure out how to fit myself in.
     I have had hundreds of days that feel like more than I can handle..... today was one of those days. Everything annoyed me, everything upset me and sadly everything overwhelmed me. I  had a really hard time getting seat belted in on my emotional rollercoaster, and a couple of those big climbs to those big loops that take you upside down.... left me feeling like I was free falling. I, have no idea how to pack a parachute, but did I ever need one.
     I think sometimes the biggest issue is money, and the fact that I never have enough. I can't rob Peter to pay Paul because I don't know where Peter is, but Paul bugs me all the time. Someday that will change, but today is not the day.
     I heard on the radio today that 1 in 5 people will be rich at some point in their life for at least one year. So maybe it will start in January of 2014, how fabulous would that be. An entire year to enjoy financial freedom and not have to panic knowing you have to miss work to take your child to the doctor out of town. Not having to panic would be such a nice feeling.
     I lost my mind about that very thing today. Its Christmas time and I have to take a day off of work, at our slowest time of the year, when every hour plays a huge role in sinking or swimming. I was hoping this would be the week that got me close to shore, instead I got pushed back out in the water, and get to spend another week hoping I don't sink. So not only do I need to learn how to pack a parachute, I need a life raft.
     Its possible I have the winning lottery numbers, so maybe I should check. Imagine how your life would change, and how much more you could do for your children. Doesn't seem fair that one of us hasn't won it yet. I know if you're reading this that you would be just like me.... changing the lives of so many people. Wouldn't it be fun? After I did what I needed to do for my family and friends and helped all the people I could help.... I would go see Phantom of the Opera, over and over, then go see if Criss Angel could really levitate me, I have to know!! Hmmmm, just think of it! Wouldn't you like to know how Mr. Angel does what he does?
     However close I came to hitting the ground face first today, I ended the day uninjured.. Thank goodness, I wonder how many of us are #5001 on the list and where we are supposed to insert ourselves on that list in the first place.
Until tomorrow.......